yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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