it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize