Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
