she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
