oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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