we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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