Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
