he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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