Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
