Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm sobbing to NWA
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