I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Randomize
