She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
