thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
