covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
