NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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