He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
