Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
