the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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