so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
My liver just had a heart attack.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
