i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize