So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
