just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
