David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize