I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize