I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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