Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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