We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
