I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
