How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
