she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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