It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
