I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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