eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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