Sponge bath it is.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
