She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
