She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
