I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize