thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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