just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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