idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
