If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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