Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
