If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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