I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
