im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
