On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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