3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
