Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize