apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
