So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
