I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
How does one acquire holy water?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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