She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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