He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
