I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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